Skip to main content

The Murphy Family 8.0 - The details



Yesterday I posted the above picture to Facebook with the caption: 


The Murphy Family 8.0. Coming in 2016!
 #thismomsgonnaneedlotsofgraceandlotsofcoffee #adoptionrocks #andsodobabies

And that was it.  No real explanations.  In some ways, I did want people to stare at the picture and attempt to figure it out.  I was trying to be slightly creative.  But, I did want to share further details, for anyone who did not wade through the comments and read my replies to questions.

So here are the details:

- As you all remember, we are adopting the cutest little two year old boy, Thomas Joseph, or TJ. We expect him to be home late February or early March.

- We are also having a baby!  I am right around 17 weeks pregnant, due May 9, 2016

- Because I am old of advanced maternal age, there are some pretty amazing tests they can do, simply by taking my blood, that can tell, with around 95% accuracy, if the baby has any genetic disorders, etc.  This blood test can also tell you the sex of the baby.  We are having a girl!  We have known for weeks now.

- If all goes well, Thomas will be home just 2-3 months before the baby is born.

- When the baby is born, we will have a 12 year old, a 9 year old, an 8 year old, a 3 year old, a newly adopted 2.5 year old, and a baby.  Crazy

- For those of you who like math and numbers:  The number of children in our family will go from 3 (a number held for 7 years) to 6 in the span of 18 months.  Sigh, breathe deep, Katie.

- Other crazy facts: we will no longer fit in our new-to-us van.  I got rid of baby items and clothing a long time ago, so we have nothing for the baby.  And keeping with that theme, when we were matched with Felicity, I got rid of all of our young boy clothes . . . as of now, TJ has no clothes either!

Head spinning? Do not worry, mine kept spinning for about a month.  There are still moments I wonder if this is all real or I am somehow imagining it all.  I have seen our daughter twice on ultrasound, I feel her move and I no longer fit in my normal clothes, but somehow, some days, I still wonder if, in 2016, we will really have TJ and a baby.  I think I can totally understand those women who somehow are in denial that they are pregnant, until they actually give birth!

So, in case you have not figured out from the above information, to say that this is all a surprise, is an understatement.  I am a planner, by nature.  Thomas was not really in "my plan."  I figured we would wait a little, adopt a girl later on and be done.  But God had other, much more wild, beautiful plans.  And we are certainly not crazy enough to plan a baby and an adoption at the same time.  I often wonder if I, if we, the whole family, can handle all the changes that are to come.  And one of the days, I was knee deep in fear, feeling this way, I read this quote:

"I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. 
I just wish that He didn't trust me so much." - Mother Teresa

And I knew.  God has got this.  He will give us the strength we need to help TJ attach to us and meld into our family and have a baby too.  I know it will not be easy.  But, God doesn't always call us to easy.  It may not be easy, but it will be beautiful.  

The last few months have had some tough moments.  We thought we might  lose Thomas.  It really looked like we would have to stop the adoption and I was devastated.   But, God moved mountains and made a miracle happen.  I have cried many tears because I will not be able to travel to China to get TJ, but my joy that he is coming home far surpasses my sadness because I will miss Gotcha Day.  Our agency has been amazing to us.  We are already talking with our social worker about what to do when Thomas comes home and how to help him and Felicity to adjust to the changes in our family and how to help the boys not feel lost in the shuffle.  

Aside from the stress of the possible changes in our adoption, I have physically been feeling pretty good.  I am tired more than normal, but overall I am feeling much better than anticipated.

Finally, we are all excited.  The boys are thrilled and cannot wait until TJ comes home and we have the baby!  Andrew, my youngest boy, cannot wait to see a baby be "borned" (as he says).  Two out of three of the boys are so happy to have another sister. One boy is now pushing for a 12 passenger van.  

As our family navigates the upcoming months, please keep us in your prayers. Especially, these specific prayer requests:

- That I continue to have a healthy pregnancy with no complications or health issues.
- That Thomas comes home ASAP and also has no health complications and that his heart is healthy.
- That our adoption will be fully funded.  (Due to first trimester sickness, etc, I have not been able to complete most of the grant applications we had intended to do.  Nor have we done most of the fundraisers we had planned.  We have a short span of time to come up with the rest of the money for the adoption, approx $15,000. Please pray we are able to do so.)

Thank you all for sharing in our joy and excitement!




Comments

  1. Wow Katie, a girl!! So cool. I am so happy for you guys and I know you can do it all with lots of grace and coffee! We had six aged 11 and under, but the older kids were so helpful (as I'm sure you already see with Felicity). Just having someone to entertain the littles is amazing. It's funny how God saw your openness to life and threw in an extra kid while He could :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is just such incredible, beautiful, amazing news. God is so full of generosity and surprises. So excited for you and will definitely be praying

    ReplyDelete
  3. That is awesome news! I can imagine how your head was/is spinning, but you have God on your side, and you know He provides. Let me know if I can help in any way...if you have another auction, etc.

    ReplyDelete
  4. My eyes are filling up again with your beautiful news!!! I'm just so happy for you and will be praying for all your children to be home and safe <3

    ReplyDelete
  5. Katie- I know it's probably such a complicated mix of emotions, including some fear, but my gosh, I am just so freaking happy for you. I couldn't stop smiling through this whole thing. I think it's so wild when God just decides to so clearly show his hand in the lives of others. I will be holding your specific prayer requests close to my heart- all I keep thinking is, joy, joy, joy... more joy- that is the only word that comes to mind. How much Joy He wants to shower your family with! thank you for being an incredible witness to what God can do if you allow Him to lead.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Super exciting! Thomas will need 3t clothes Jack just grew out of size 3 let me see what I have to send you. Praying for all your intentions!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh my! My head is spinning reading this, but I'm grinning as well. I know well God's sense of humor but His amazing grace too. I'll add you to my prayer board and send many prayers your way. Congrats!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. So insanely happy for your news!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Praying God's graces will be with you. What a big year you have ahead of you.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Congratulations!! So exciting. Do you have a paypal email or link for donations ? have you considered gofundme or something similar? Thanks!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Gift (Our NFP story) Part 2

(You can read  Part 1 here

     So, by the time Andrew was 18 months old, we knew God was saying no to having more children at the time.  And, as mentioned before, He provided so much peace about it, that we knew we had discerned correctly.  Yet, even with that peace, I had to mourn the fact the we might not ever have any more children.  Yes, we were still open to life, of course, but from the time after Andrew’s birth, until today, we practiced NFP faithfully to avoid pregnancy.  And it took time to accept that we might not have any more children.  There were times when I would hold a friend’s new born baby and then go home and cry because I knew I might not ever know the joy of holding my own baby again.  We live in a community where life is celebrated and families are large.  Usually more than one friend is pregnant at a time.  In those early days, each pregnancy announcement was met with great joy for the friend, but often left me with an empty feeling.  I understood, in many way…

My verse for the year

But now, O LORD, You are our Father, We are the clay, and You our potter; And all of us are the work of Your hand.   Isaiah 6:48


There are boxes being unpacked in our home.  Boxes packed and meant to be unpacked in a different home, our new home, in a matter of two weeks.  


About two weeks before Christmas things changed.  Situations changed.  And what we were convinced was God's will just months before, seemed so unlike it now.  Things beyond our control happened and suddenly we were praying and we felt that the best and only solution was to walk away from this new house.  And at the end of  a week of uncertainty, anxiety and tension, once the decision was made to walk away from the house, there was a great deal of peace.   But, as the dust settles from the decision, even though we know it is the best for everyone involved, there is still sadness, still this sense of loss.  As we have prayed again and again, we know each of all of the steps we have made in this whole house journey …

On Waiting

This past weekend we went to a book party for a priest friend who had his second book Living the Beatitudes:A Journey to Life in Christ published last fall.  The party was hosted by another Catholic author.  And, after the cake was cut and people were sitting quietly, the host of the party began to speak.  He began to talk about how great this book is and how insightful so much of it is.  Then he began to share quotes from it.  And I felt as if he chose two of them for me:

"Waiting is the training ground of trust."

"Beauty is the crescendo of waiting"
Now, although we have this book and my husband has read it, I have not (sorry, Fr. B).  But that night, I sat with the book while my hubby and I sat down to attempt to watch a movie and I scoured the book for the above quotes.  Too shy to ask the host for the pages for these quotes, I skimmed page by page until I found them.  And after I found the first quote, I was confronted with line after line about waiting.  I read…